Hi Ho, Hi Ho......I am stuck in Ohio

I consider myself to be an accomplished world traveler. Even though I have never set foot in California (proudly) I have been to numerous other exotic locations. I am currently in fantastic Fairborn, Ohio. I have been here for two weeks. Long weeks. Well I have about one week left and I have gotten tired of sitting in my room. So tomorrow I am going to rent a car for a couple of days and see Fabulous Ohio.

Like any great hotel, the Wright-Patterson Inn has a great display of things to do. I have selected a few of the brochures of interesting things I would like to see.

The first is Tecumseh! Really who wouldn't want to see this show. The brochure states:

Tecumseh! The Ultimate Outdoor Drama Experience

Witness the epic life story of the legendary Shawnee leader as he struggles to defend his sacred homelands in the Ohio country during the late 1700’s. “Tecumseh!” has been labeled as one of the most mesmerizing dramas in the nation.

I agree there is certainly nothing more epic then a half naked dude with a burning loin cloth. I am just surprised that I have never heard of this wonderful play.

Somewhat taken aback by the image on the flier, I was quickly comforted by Jim Knippenberg from Cincinnati.... who swears to the fact that this is the best ever.

Still, I am not sure if a bunch of half naked dudes is the answer to my boredom.

The next flier I grabbed was for the "Shaker Village of Pleasant Hill." Seriously folks, nothing says fun and adventure like a shaker village. As I looked at the brochure I noticed that the guy making what appears to be a chair is surrounded by women. I was unaware that Shakers were also chick magnets.

I guess most of the women were turned away from a guy with a burning crotch and found him to be less threatening. On the back of the flier it suggested I spend the night.

Wow, I thought my current room had crappy accommodations, at least I wouldn't have to sleep on the floor. Apparently Shakers make great chairs but have not yet discovered beds.

At this point I was beginning to run low on options, but being the historian that I am (I did graduate with honors from the University of Montana) I saw the Ohio Frontier Land.

They even have an Indian museum that would no doubt rival the National Museum of the American Indian in Washington D.C.

1984 called....they want their crappy museum back.