Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Simon: Need I Say More?


Writing a regular blog is complicated. Especially since my life is not. Today, I would like to highlight a very special person. Not special in that he requires his own bus, but special in that he brings a very unique flair to the Tsunami. Simon is/was possibly one of the easiest kids to raise. In fact, he was so easy that he tricked us into having #4 (Noah). Although kids are not accidents, he was certainly a surprise. In fact, he was such a surprise that it was not until we reached Tok, Alaska on our way to Virginia that we realized there was going to be a new addition. We stopped for dinner and Emily said "I am not feeling well, I am going back to the room." I thought....well it would not be appropriate to post what I was thinking. On a side note many of you may not have heard of Tok.

If you have not heard of Tok, you are not alone. It is indicated by the A

Simon was the smallest of the litter, weighing in at less then 8 pounds. I always thought of him as sickly and frail. So when he was old enough we started a strict exercise regime. You may ask yourself what kind of regime you would put a 20 month child on. Primarily it consists of pushing your older brother around and climbing stuff.

The Basement Climbing wall I built to work on dexterity, strength, and muscle endurance (mainly out of boredom).



Instead of using tackle dummies, Simon uses Vance. I love the look on Vance's face.


The results are amazing. Simon has turned into a work of art; perfection, much like something Michelangelo would sculpt. Going back to my art appreciation days, I found the following picture. It is fascinating the resemblance that Michelangelo's David has to my Simon.






Although it is anatomically correct, for Simon's dignity I blocked out his package. He will thank me later.

Take this picture for example, not only does my lawn look like it is grass and not weeds, but Simon also looks as though his chest and abs were chiseled from the finest Italian marble. Also take note of his ability to rip the chain off of my bike with a single hand.







Why does he always go for the greasiest parts?













Another interesting feature is the fact that Simon does not appear to have a neck. Take a look for yourself. I have looked for it on numerous occasions, this seems to make him better suited for running into things (like his brother).



No neck.



Again, no neck.

The amazing thing is that for such a sweet boy, he is absolutely a small tank. In true Tsunami fashion, he creates a swath of destruction. I suppose that is why Emily started calling him the "Simonater," which then was shortened to "Nater"




I think that he could have posed as a stunt double for Arnold, what do you think?


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